Mind Your Own Business

My mind often boggles when confronted with so many people so willing to tell other people how they're living their lives or raising their kids "wrong." You name the topic—breastfeeding vs. formula, working vs. SAHM, TV vs. no TV—everyone has an opinion, and they're willing to blab about it (and scold you about it). Especially on the web, where the opinions expressed are often extremely harsh, because those expressing it can hide away behind their computer screens.

I definitely have my own opinions about how children should be raised, and how life should be lived—and my ideas (for the most part) seem to work well for my family. But one of my biggest opinions is that I should, generally, keep my opinions to myself. We're a working-mom, mostly vegetarian, lots of pets, TV's okay, pierce-your-ears-at-age-5 kind of family. But I know that that doesn't work for everyone, so I don't feel like I should force my own views on everyone else.

I'm tired of watching women tear other women down over the choices they make, or the lifestyles that are forced on them. (Most women I know don't have much of a choice in their ability to stay at home, for instance.) Can't we all just get along, embrace our differences, and enjoy each other's company? Be a little kinder, a little gentler, a little more supportive?

I'm thankful that my circle of friends has always been supportive of my choices—even if the outside world isn't always.

Comments

[Shosh]

i couldnt agree more. i stay at home, my best friend works. i breast feed, another friend doesn't. i eat meat, a friend is a vegetarian.
but i dont care! because theyre my friends! and their choices are their own, just like my choices are my own! i cant even believe the people who ruin friendships with judgement over these things. life is hard enough - we dont need to make it harder for each other!

[Jeanne]

Well said - I don't think there is one magic potion for being the "perfect" Mom or raising a child the "perfect" way. Reality is that one "way" does not work for all - it just can't. Let's celebrate that! Life would be pretty darn boring if it did!!

[Bradi Nathan]

Wow, you sound a lot like me (minus the pets part) that it's kind of creepy. I often envision myself standing on a podium saying that very thing "Can't we all just get along?" I've even gone so far as to do something about it by creating a site where moms can actually empower and inspire one another. Imagine that?! Finally.

Bradi
Co-Founder
MyWorkButterfly.com

[Lovina]

:) Nice post. Needs to be said more often. There's nothing that said that because you're a mom, you need to conform to everyone else. And...it's impossible. Everyone is different and has different views on how to raise kids. It's called diversity. If you have a chance, pls share your wisdom with a mom at momconnect who's vexed by this very same issue!
http://www.momconnect.com/showthread.php?t=106

Thank you.

[Snick :)]

Excellent post! Well worth remembering when someone wants to blurt out their "own advice" at someone. Better to bite your tongue!

Best,
Snick
dd Sunshine 8 Viet Nam
dd Brilliance 3 Fuling China